Thursday, January 10, 2008

Expectations High for '08

Having only recently mastered the complexities of helicopter flight, I can now turn my attention to you -- My Pack. While I can't complain too bitterly about 2007, I would be lying if I told that I'd be content with the same 'ole same 'ole for 2008. To quote Anthony Bourdain: "I'm hungry for more." And that's where you - as of today - my 49 self-selected subordinates come into clearer focus. Look at me in this photo (above). Sure I'm regal. Of course there are no monkey-person sounds to adequately describe my Majesty.

But examine the image more closely. . .

I'm wasting away! Starving! Famished!! I mean, the girth abruptly stops at my legs. DO Cry for Me, Pack of Hallie. Then, after you have wiped away your tears, I want you to get into your car, drive to the nearest Giant Eagle, and bring me a fresh calf's liver. Actually, the good news of today's communique is that I have decided to make Sunday mornings (10 am) a designated "Do Drop In and Feed Hallie" fete. To maintain your (ever precarious) status in my pack hierarchy, please make plans to start attending.

Your Leader,

Hallie

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